We're owl exterminators (shadow_hive) wrote,
We're owl exterminators

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See the sky turn red

So tonight I was content sitting at the computer, rubbing my eyes every few minutes, watching random crap on Tv and slowly writing.

Then I decided to go to fuckyou_mcr and everything just... snapped.

Few things manage to keep me sane anymore, especially with everything falling apart so rapidly. I think I could count said things on one, maybe two hands. One of them is writing.

I know I haven't done as much as I've wanted or needed to because of what's been going on. Plus the increase of stress has resulted in an increase to my block. Nevertheless I try and write. I slowly work on what I do, all too often getting ideas (which is beyond evil). Whenever I have enough finished to post, I post it as soon as I'm able. That's how I work.

Already I'd decided to stop posting to mychemicalslash because I think that it's too bitchy.

However, what I didn't know is that there's a far more increased level of bitchyness at fuckyou_mcr. Sure, I expected there to be bitchyness (I got it from the name) but not as much as I saw there. Going through the posts (boredom is a fucking bad thing to have) I saw that not one, but five (at least) posts linked to stuff I'd done. Each one had comments in double figures about how much they hated what I'd done. About how disgusting or wrong or stupid my stuff was. Then the most recent one seems to want to highlight the fact that I'm a guy not just in bold but in capital letters too. And that's then followed by a mockery of anyone that commented anyone positive to it. Also one of the comments (to one of the other posts) sounds scary and stalkery (going on my Myspace?).

Seeing all that prompted me to close everything I was doing. Seeing shit like that has drained what will I had left to write completely.

Don't expect anything from me anytime soon.

If I do get the will to write again (and it'll be doubtful I'll do anything in the MCR fandom bar the ones that are half done) it will most likely only be posted here and nowhere beyond (bar my writing journal).

But after seeing that it's a big if.
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